ohmidog!

Listen very carefully to the beginning of this Associated Press news report — about Michael Vick’s guilty plea to a state dogfighting charge.

At least it’s supposed to be a state dogfighting charge. No matter how many times I listen to it, it sounds like the reporter is saying “a state dog farting charge.”

“Completely dog-mad.”

That’s how a publicist describes a wealthy accountant and his doctor wife who are spending a quarter of a million pounds — just under $400,000 — on a house for their two Great Danes.

The doggie domicile will feature a 52-inch plasma TV; a retina-scan entry system that will allow the Danes, but no other dogs, entry; two bedrooms and a separate lounging area; two elevated temperature-controlled beds lined with sheepskin, from which the dogs can see out through the giant windows; automatic dispensers of food and chilled, filtered water; a temperature-controlled pool/spa; and an outdoor adventure play area — all of which can be controlled and viewed by the owners via computer from anywhere in the world.

The 1,000-square-foot kennel will adjjoin the main house, both of which are being built on the exclusive Lower Mill Estate near Cirencester, Gloucestershire, according to the London Daily Mail. 

Work is due to start next April and take around 18 months. The owners have requested anonymity. 

“All we can say is that they are a retired couple who are completely dog-mad,” a publicist said. “They said: ‘We want the perfect living space for us and our dogs’ and that’s what they are getting.”

(Illustration by London Daily Mail)