ohmidog!

This month’s award for dog’s worst enemy — aka schmuck of the month — goes to David Lench, who’s accused of driving three-inch nails through the pickets of his neighbor’s fence so that his neighbor’s German shepherds would cut themselves if they ran alongside it.

As a result, one of the neighbor’s three German shepherds suffered puncture wounds, according to Newsday.

Lench narrowly beat out Mayor Don Call of McCune, Kansas, who, in response to a citizen’s complaint, shot and killed two nuisance dogs from his car seat with a rifle, and the Wisconsin woman whose dog froze to the sidewalk.

For Lench 50, of Middletown, N.J., it’s the second time he’s been charged with animal cruelty.

Camp Bow Wow may not sound like the place for a romantic getaway — but if you go there Saturday between noon and 3 p.m., you’ll have a chance to win one.

You’ll also have a chance  to take home some love — the kind that comes in furry bundles.

Camp Bow Wow in Columbia is holding “Cupids and Canines,” an event that will feature adoptable pets from BARCS, the Maryland SPCA and the Partnership for Animal Welfare (PAW). Golden Retriever Rescue, Education and Training (GRREAT) will also be there, providing microchipping.

Also on hand will be Terri Diener, animal communicator; Joy Freedman, animal behaviorist; Lisa Solomon, pet photographer; and Robyn Jacobs, of Pet Tag Creations.

Nature’s Variety will be showcasing their pet food selection and offering free samples, and goodie bags including items from ohmidog! and other sponsors will be handed out as well. There will be a raffle for two romantic getaways at the Harbor View Inn in Annapolis.

You’ll also have the chance to donate to Bow Wow Buddies, Camp Bow Wow’s foundation is to promote the health and welfare of dogs worldwide by focusing on finding foster and lifetime homes for unwanted dogs, promoting humane education and treatment, and investing in research and treatment for dogs devastated by illness and disease.

And, just maybe, Mr. or Mrs. Right will be there, too, or at least Mr. or Mrs. Right Dog.

Camp Bow Wow is at 7165 Oakland Mills Road in Columbia.

During her nine-year career as a search and rescue dog, Marley sniffed around the rubble left by eight hurricanes, and crawled through the ruins of the World Trade Center, says Tampa, Florida fire rescue Captain Mark Bogush.

In the years they worked as a team, Marley never left Bogush’s side. On Wednesday, when the black lab’s stomach became twisted and distended from a condition known as canine bloat, Bogush never left hers, according to Tampa Bay Online.

“I got 12 excellent years from Marley,” saud Bogush. “The best thing for her was to go to that little puppy palace in the sky.”

Bogush said he spent years steeling himself for the possibility Marley would suffer a fatal injury in a disaster area. Instead, after retiring a few years ago, she fell victim to far more common ailments –like arthritis, hearing loss and, finally, stomach bloat. Vets predicted little possibility that surgery would lead to a full recovery. It was up to Bogush to decide whether to euthanize her.

Bogush recalled the first time he saw her, when she was a 6-month-old puppy, wreaking havoc on the home of her owner. What the owner saw as trouble waiting to happen, Bogush saw as high energy, waiting for an outlet.

She took quickly to search and rescue training and treated the work like a game of hide-and-seek. Searching amidst the rubble of the World Trade Center, Marley was motivated by the idea that if she found trapped people, they would “pop up and play with her,” Bogush said.

Stump, the elderly Sussex spaniel who won best in show at Westminster, appeared on the Today Show this morning along with his equally laid back owner.

The oldest dog ever to win best in show — by a full two years — Stump seemed to be taking the victory in stride.

According to his owner, Scott Sommer, Stump, after his tour as the nation’s new top dog, will return to the retirement he went into five years ago when a bacterial infection almost killed him.

The Today Show interview shed little other light on his illness, which was treated at Texas A&M University.

As David Frei, who also appeared on the show and handled most of the questions, put it, some dogs are full of themselves, some a little more laid back. Stump, the new numero uno, definitely falls into the latter category.

Mayor Don Call received a standing ovation Monday at the McCune City Council meeting for shooting and killing two dogs who had been the subject of citizen complaints.

More than 70 people showed up for the meeting, many of them to show support for the Kansas mayor, KMBC-TV reported. Call admitted to shooting the dogs after a neighbor complained they were chasing children.

“We all should be proud we have a mayor like Don Call that will take care of us and protect our kids,” Shirley Showalter told the council.

Call has been charged with two felony counts of animal cruelty and one misdemeanor count of criminal discharge of a weapon.

Duane Wahl, who owned the two dogs, did not attend the meeting, but he told The Joplin Globe that residents were wrong to support the mayor: “The fact is, whether they like the idea that he shot my dogs or not, he still shot my dogs on my property. They were on chains in my yard when he shot them. It was still wrong. It don’t matter if my dogs got loose in the past.”

According to police and the mayor, Call shot the dogs with a 9 mm rifle as they lay on the sidewalk outside Wahl’s house.

Crawford County Sheriff Sandy Horton has said that since July 2008, his office has received four complaints about Wahl’s dogs running loose and acting aggressively but that none of the complaints came from a victim.

We doubt that Baltimore’s mayor — upon whose shoes my dog once sat — will be showing up but, if you want to drop by, here are the details for our “ohmidog! Identity Crisis and Breed Reveal Party.”

Where: Idle Hour Tavern, 201 E. Fort Ave., Baltimore

When: Today, 6 – 9 p.m.

Background: My dog Ace had his DNA tested a year and a half ago, as part of a series of stories and dogumentary I did for the Baltimore Sun. The test, based on a swab from his cheek, showed him to contain Rottweiler and chow. Since then, the tests have become more sophisticated, and capable of detecting more breeds. So we tested Ace again, this time, using the Wisdom Panel MX Mixed Breed test kit, which analyzes DNA through blood samples. It came out differently. We also tested Elliot, who won our “What’s In Your Mutt?” contest. Two breeds were found in him as well.

Tonight, you can meet the dogs and, in exchange for a donation to the Franky Fund for sick and injured animals at BARCS (Baltimore Animal Rescue and Care Shelter), make a guess as to what breeds are in them. The two who guess correctly will receive (in the mail) ohmidog! hooded sweatshirts. (In the event of ties, the earlier guess wins.) We’ll start taking guesses at 6 p.m. The “reveal” takes place at 8 p.m.

Our little celebration of mutthood will also include a raffle for a treat basket from K-9 Kraving Dog Food, human snacks (including, of course “mixed” nuts), information on how to find out what’s in your mutt, and other prizes.

All proceeds will go to the Franky Fund.

A Sussex spaniel named “Stump,” who almost died five years ago, was named best in show as the 133rd annual Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show came to a close tonight.

Stump was the oldest of the seven group winners, and the oldest dog to ever receive a best in show.

The seven dogs in the final competition, selected from 2,500 dogs entered in the show, were: a standard poodle, a giant schnauzer, a Scottish deerhound, a puli, a Scottish terrier, a Brussels griffon, and Stump.

Stump almost died in 2004, but was saved by veterinarians from Texas A&M University, according to his owner, Scott  Sommer. In an short interview on USA Network, Sommer said the liver-colored dog has been off the show circuit for five years.

“He’s just been hanging out at home and being a pet and sleeping on the bed and doing whatever he wants to do,” Sommer said.

Five years ago, “he got very sick … his whole body just completely quit,” Sommer said. The dog recovered after spending 19 days in treatment at Texas A&M, he said.

(Photo courtesy of Westminster Kennel Club)

This elderly dog was found yesterday near Key Highway in Baltimore. He’s about 10 pounds, black and grey and has a crooked front right paw.

If you know who he belongs to, contact Laura at lqrobinson@gmail.com

Remember the shoplifting dog — that suspected Siberian Husky who trotted into a grocery store in Murray, Utah back before Christmas, grabbed a rawhide bone and made a clean getaway, except for being captured on the security cameras?

She’s now been identified, after being returned to the scene of the crime by her owners, who live six miles from the store.

Yes, the thieving pooch apparently traveled six miles each way to snag the bone. (Now wouldn’t that make a great advertisement for whatever company made it?)

After seeing the video, the Stirling family of Murray suspected their dog — an 11-year-old Husky named Akira — was the culprit, and drove her down to the store so that she could be positively identified.

She seemed eager to go back, the family noted.

“Yeah there’s no question. That looks exactly like the dog,” store manager Roger Adamson said. Store employees agreed, according to NBC.

When they turned her loose, she followed her nose, straight to the dog treat section.

John Stirling said he didn’t understand his dog’s incredible journey. “We’re definitely feeding her, she has boxes of treats in the cupboards.”

On the return trip to the store, the Stirlings paid for Akira’s new bone, and the one she took back in December.

Charges? None were filed, but Akira may have received a jolt when she left home, and when she returned. The Stirling’s fenceline is supposed to give her collar a electrical jolt if she tries to pass over.

Apparently, she outsmarted that device, too.

Acting on a tip passed on by the SPCA, authorities in Texas yesterday seized 22 dogs that were confined in a single station wagon, parked on the side of a road.

When officials approached the car, on an unmarked road near the police station in Pottsboro, the woman inside locked the doors and refused to come out. Pottsboro is in Grayson County, about 80 miles north of Dallas.

Inside the car were 20 adult dogs and two newborns — all appearing to be Papillons and long-hair Chihuahuas — crowded in among blankets, a pot of water and waste.  Investigators don’t know how long the dogs had been in the car, the Dallas Morning News reported.

Eventually the woman and dogs were removed from the vehicle. The animals were taken to a shelter in McKinney, according to Maura Davies, an SPCA of Texas spokesperson. The woman in the car was not charged, or identified. Officials said she was not coherent.

“We could smell ammonia from urine a few feet away from the car as we were approaching,” Davies said. “It was utterly filthy.”

SPCA staff took the dogs to the Perry Animal Care Center in McKinney, where the dogs will remain until a judge decides whether to grant custody to the owner or the SPCA.  A hearing was scheduled for next week.

(Photo courtesy of the SPCA of Texas)