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Tag: dumb

Dogs banned from Concord cemeteries

The city council in Concord, New Hampshire, has voted to ban dogs — we’re talking live ones — from cemeteries.

Dogs are no longer permitted in the 13 cemeteries in Concord as a result of the vote, and those caught disturbing the deceased will face fines between $50 and $1,000, according to the Concord Monitor.

Councilor Steve Shurtleff proposed the measure, saying using cemeteries as dog parks is disrespectful — though it’s not clear whether anyone was actually doing that to any large extent.

What the councilors were aiming at, most agree, was preventing dogs from urinating or defecating in cemeteries.

What they passed was a blanket ban that fails to take into consideration that some families might want to bring their dog to visit a deceased family member — or bring a deceased family member’s dog to visit their master’s grave.

The council — apparently obsessed with dog waste, and apparently pandering to the uptight members of their constituency — neglected to factor in the comfort dogs can provide when families are coping with the death of a loved one.

So while we admire their effort to keep dead people covered with dirt — and the rocks set atop dead people covered with dirt — pristine, we’ll have to add this to our list of dumb dog laws.

What seems to be the problem, officer?

A bad day just kept getting worse for Ralph Bias, an 18-year-old arrested in Louisiana last week.

Police stopped Bias for speeding. He was going 52 mph in a 35 mph zone (Mistake One).

The officer noticed he wasn’t wearing a seat belt (Mistake Two), and upon checking his license, saw that he was driving with a suspended one (Mistake Three).

Then, according to nola.com, the officer noticed the handrolled marijuana cigarette on the console (Mistake Four).

With some further checking, the officer found that the 2004 Lexus that Bias was driving had been reported stolen from New Orleans (Mistake Five).

At that point, the officer — not having much reason to trust the driver — made some inquiries about the Shih Tzu sitting on the front passenger seat, and ended up calling the veterinarian whose name was listed on the dog’s tags.

The vet told the officer that the pet had been stolen during a home burglary (Mistake Six).

A laptop computer in the vehicle was also found to be stolen (Mistake Seven).

In all, Bias was found with stolen items valued at $27,020, including the value of the Lexus.

Bias was booked with possession of stolen goods, marijuana possession and various traffic offenses. He was released on bond Thursday.